Vulnerabilty. Scary thought, right? Newsflash: it’s the only way you can give and experience love in return.
So, I know my post before before last was about the way when you love someone you have to be open to them and allow them to both hurt and please you coz if you close off you will experience neither hurt nor love? Yes, well, *pointing finger at myself* I am guilty of the aforementioned crime.
I noticed that eh, well, I sort of closed off everyone after a hurt I experienced; everyone including God. I was wondering why I’d go to church and just feel nothing, people are rejoicing and being all melodramatic (OK, exaggerating a little bit) when I was just stoic. I had closed myself off feeling coz feeling hurts sometimes.
So anyway, I realized that emotional insulation insulates me from even the good stuff. I can’t have it halfway, the good only and not the bad. It’s all or nothing. Tough lessons.
So anyway, I’m sort of trying to learn to feel again.
(Is this a whole load of emotional overshare? I guess it’s MY blog so…wharrreva)
Wish me luck.
I hear You call, loud and clear
It melts my heart, take my fear
Show me how to see the love that brings serenity