Tuesday Troubles

What a day, the clouds are grey and heavy and everyone is dressed in dull colours. Is it any wonder that my thoughts have turned gloomy too?

“When life hands you lemons…”

…make lemonade? Really? What does that even mean? Make the best out of it, I guess?

“A coffee bean, a carrot and an egg were put in boiling water…”

…the bean was awesome because it produced a great aroma, shame to the carrot that got soft and weak and woe unto the egg that got hardened.

So what I’m getting at is, how does one avoid getting disillusioned after life happens? How do you keep from being bitter when life hands you lemons?

Maybe I’m the woeful egg in the coffee-carrot-egg story. I tend to write off hurtful situations…once bitten, twice shy, I always say. I ward off would-be “attackers” since I am protecting myself as any self-protecting human would do. I don’t just put my finger into the fire like a little kid who’s curious about what fire feels like would do.

But somehow, that’s wrong.

Yes, I know, in this world, self-protection is allowed, lauded even. I’m talking about in the other Realm, you know, the Kingdom. Those rules are not the same as those of the world: vulnerability is praised, brokenness is beautiful, ashes somehow can be converted to beauty and tears are expressions of contriteness, which is a GOOD thing. *smh*

Is it worth it, I always wonder? Is it worth it being vulnerable to people who you are 90% sure are going to hurt you because they are human and that’s what humans do? Is it worth forgiving and opening up over and over again when your spouse hurts you because that’s the only way you can call that relationship a marriage? Is it worth it if you do all these things and still end up loving the wrong person, getting hurt and being left alone, as you were, in the end?

“Better to have loved and lost…”

…than never to have loved at all? Is that really better? Who says? It’s like saying “better to have been hurt than never to have been hurt at all”. Absolutely senseless.

And yet…

“Man is not an island.”

“It is not good for man to be alone.”

“Perfect love casts out all fear.”

“Love always believes, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.”

I’m trying to live by the rules of God’s kingdom. What’s funny is, here I am, half in the world (since I live here) and half in the Kingdom (since the Holy Spirit lives in me…hard to explain). Hard, isn’t it? Understatement of the century.

I feel the need to end this on a positive note, something like, “yes, I will make it!” or, something.

I’m just learning. Learning, learning, incessant learning.

But God’s grace is sufficient, He will never give me more than I can bear. (There, POSITIVE NOTE!)

Happy Tuesday, people.


4 thoughts on “Tuesday Troubles

  1. I am the egg in this story..no doubt..hardened by hard situations… and inasmuch as I know I need to let that aspect of my character change…to embrace a little bean I don’t know that I can…

    His Grace is sufficient <<<<<..THIS is true!!!and most days that's all we need to know 🙂

    Pray this period passed???? and to the question is it worth it? I pose Bob Marley's (I think) quote to you: People are always gonna hurt you, you just need to decide who is worth suffering for.

    • I love that Bob Marley quote you just wrote, I think it sums it up. And I’m still in this period, I discovered I’d hardened my heart to the point that I couldn’t even feel God’s love. How’s that for conviction? I’m still working on that. Thanks dear.

    • Hey Shiro, no, I didn’t mean love=hurt. I meant in the “better to have loved and lost…” scenario, you end up hurt in the end. So why is it better?
      I don’t necessarily expect answers, I guess I’m just questioning beliefs and stuff. And maybe looking a little too long at the bad side of things instead of the good side…

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