OK so I’ve had this dream of being self-sufficient FOREVER coz deep down I’ve never been comfortable asking for money from parents or relying on others for my upkeep, well, since I was a teen I guess.

and lately I realized that I got it! I got the dream, it came true. I can support myself (well, barely, but it counts) I hardly ask for mum’s financial support (looking forward to never asking for it) and I can buy whatever I want (within budget, of course)

I have really longed for this day and it crept up on me and I didn’t even notice.

It’s been a hard road getting here, from no job to dead-end job and now to decent job. Of course it’s not guaranteed that I’ll always be here but for now, I’m enjoying the ride.

Independence.

Exactly. That’s the word.

No one asking me why I got home late (coz I live alone), eating ice-cream for supper AND breakfast, watching movies till late, having friends over (my house is no palace but it still rocks to have people over), not having to cook or do chores unless I feel like it…I’m loving it!

Of course there’s the myriad challenges also, but who wants to get into that??!

Did I mention that I’ve found rest too? I talked about it in this post and God basically just splashed a bucket of cold water in my face and told me to style up and let Him handle my life. The elusive house am looking for, job security, finances, guys, all of it. He KNOWS. And He is SO MUCH BETTER at handling it all than I am. And I am 100% positively sure that His plan beats mine by 100 yards. So why am I stressing? His eye is on the sparrow, and I know he watches little ol’ me.

I’m liking this moment, this here and now.

Thank you God.

Now I can mark that off my list of 100 things to do before I die.

Think of any of your long-life wishes. Have any come true?

Care to share?

Another sinking sun, and I am filled with worry
With every morning comes uncharted territory
Am I too young and restless
To live the way the fearless do?

I think it’s time I start to…live
Unafraid of tomorrow
Live, knowing You’re in control
Live, this life wasn’t made to waste away
I wanna live

Take my concerns and cares, give me new revival
I may be breathing air, but You’re my soul survival
I wanna know the freedom, that can only come from You

I’m so tired of waiting
There’s no more time to lose
So give me strength to move
To live

- Krystal Meyers

sing me a love song

say a little poetry

show me that you love me

with a little more than those rare three words

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

remember my birthday

give me a card and flowers

maybe some chocolate

just a simple gesture

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

i don’t ask for much

just that you would notice

turn and look up

smile when i walk into the room

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

notice my new hairstyle

compliment me on my cooking

just look at me sometimes

even when there’s no reason to

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

all i ask

is that you hold my hand in public

show people that i’m someone

that we are together

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

i just need some affirmation

now and then

that i’m beautiful, wise and elegant

that you think the world of me

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

turn to me with concern

when i tell you about my day

laugh with me

and cry with me too

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

just be here when i’m here

just be present and care

just be my man

with a little more than words

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

©Rockhead, 2009

~ To all the lonely yet taken women out there

Thank God it’s Friday!

I have literally been waiting with baited breath for this day! I don’t know why but I’m just excited today. I even #FF’ed my followers on Twitter yesterday…thinking it was a Friday! lol!

I am excited about…

…just the fact that the weekend is here and spending time with my family.

Today I’m feeling…

…excited! Over nothing, really

My Funky Friday theme song is…

…the one that’s playing right now [coz I don't really have a theme song today] – Someday by Atemi Oyungu and Chris Adwar. It’s such a simple Kenyan love song, I love the lyrics…may put them up soon. They’re all in Swahili. It’s such a  sweet song

This weekend I…

…will be house-hunting again [boring!] and having a get-together with some friends from church, plus spending time with family. It’s going to be inspirational, I can tell. Get ready for some depth from me next week

I am really craving…

…hmmm…this one is a hard one. Ice-cream, as usual…but I really want to see a friend of mine who recently got back into the country. Can’t wait to hear all about his adventure.

I wish…

…I could just get a house already! Good location, within budget, safe and attractive, with all the necessary amenities. Is that too much to ask??

I hope…

…and pray that my dear friend finds the solace she is searching for…once and for all. And that I will be strong enough for her during this tough time.

Today’s inspirational quote is…

…”I long, as does every human being, to be at home wherever I find myself.”
~ Maya Angelou

Have a Happy Furahi-Day [Furahi means Happy in Swahili]

I guess it’s safe to say that I’m in a good place now.

It’s been a hard year with so much baggage to sort out, so many challenges to overcome, so many changes to get used to and so many miles to push myself to walk just one more step till I get there.

I’m still in those places. But I guess being in those places has done something to me: it has made me stronger…or less oblivious. Now I embrace change, albeit with a beating heart at first (this coming from the former winner of the prestigious Miss Anti-Change crown).

What I’m most grateful for this year (yeah, I know Thanksgiving was like a month ago) is the fact that God kept away the bad guys…you know, the men who are out to get me and make my life miserable as I while away the hours staring at the phone and wishing on stars.

I met some jerks, yes, but I didn’t let them in. I got hurt, yes, but I didn’t have to go through break-ups because nothing had started in the first place.

I always get in too deep in  these things. I like a guy then I can’t let him go even when things are no longer working. It takes ages for me to move on. So I’m just grateful that I didn’t commit to anyone this year coz God knows none of them was worth it.

I now know He hears my prayers. I mean, I always knew but there’s always a fresh awakening to that reality.

So I’m praying the same for next year: not to commit to anyone that God doesn’t want for me but to wait on His perfect timing.

Urgh, this post wasn’t meant to be about THAT! It was supposed to be full of insightful tidbits about life and growth and change!

Anyway, Happy Belated Thanksgiving everyone! What are you grateful for this year?

Good Morning the night is over and gone
I thought once this dark would last for so long

Feel the sunlight on my face
You have brought me through this place

Jesus, Jesus You found me
Through the long night you led me
You set me free

Do you see just what You’ve done in my life?
You gave me more than I hoped for now I

Feel the sunlight on my face
You have brought me through this place

Jesus, Jesus You found me
Through the long night you led me
You set me free

- Barlow Girl

I copied this from Revealed’s blog under duress from Lilburdy so I hope it’s ok now that I have cited my sources….lol.

Thank God it’s Friday!

I greatly anticipate Fridays because I have no work on Saturday! I mean, routine really bores me, contrary to popular opinion. Monday to Friday, work…Saturday and Sunday…randomness!

Randomness

I am excited about…

…going to see Mo Faya (a musical) today with one very awesome Lilburdy, and a friends meet-up tomorrow

Musical Play

Today I am feeling…

…unfazed. I feel nothing for the strange stares I’m getting from being the newbie in the department and I feel nothing for the snobbish workmates who sometimes don’t feel like saying hi. WHATEVER!

Calmness

 

My Funky Friday Theme Song is…

…Enclosed By You by Telecast. It has the most beautiful arrangemement and the piano and guitar work is simply amazing IMO. The lyrics are really deep too and it’s been playing in my head for a while now…

This weekend I…

…have to go house-hunting. No agents, no fake leads, no disappointment please!

Perfect House

I am really craving…

…chocolate-chip ice-cream. Extra chunky. Who shall come to my rescue?

Chocolate Chip Ice Cream

I wish…

…I could go for an all-expenses paid trip to the Coast and have two weeks off work to have fun in the sun and sand with all my friends. Wouldn’t that be grand?

Beach Holiday!

I hope…

…I get a place to move to this weekend coz I am seriously sick of where I stay. Am almost desperate!

Today’s inspirational quote is…

…our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our greatest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure…

Have a Fabulous Friday!!!!